It was a case for compensation
Before Mr Justice Lawler
Brought by an injured deck-hand
Who had been working on a trawler
He chose to represent himself
For, truth to tell, he had no wealth.
The courtroom was quite crowded
The Press were there in force
And the Judge’s wife and family
Well, they were there of course
To see how he’d conduct the case
His very first, in that strange place.
The youngest child sat very still
As he’d been told to do
And as he gazed around the court
He had a splendid view
Until a man squeezed in and sat
In front of him, and he was fat!
The youngest child then craned his neck
But nothing he could see
The plaintiff’s voice kept droning on
About his life at sea
‘There was this time y’r Honour
I was working on a lugger’-
When a little voice piped loud and clear
‘YOU IN MY WAY YOU BUGGER!’