I bought a jar of face cream just the other day

And, entre nous, it really was expensive;

Could I believe the wondrous claims it made?

The list went on, and it was most extensive.

 

Now, I’ll never know for sure

If these claims were true, or not,

For I dropped the jar on the bathroom floor

And lost the blooming lot.

 

For it shattered, and it splattered –

Some landed on the loo

And I was in a quandary,

What was I to do?

Was it possible I could retrieve

Some of that costly goo?

For a large amount of hard-earned cash

Had ended up with quite a splash.

 

Of course not. I had to clean it up

And that took a fair amount of toil

And by the time I finished

My blood had reached the boil.

 

So I made a vow, right there and then

Since my days are growing shorter,

No more expensive creams for me –

I’ll stick to soap and water.